Grief Journal Prompts

If you are in immediate danger, call 111. Free 24/7 support: call or text 1737.
Grief Support NZ — Free Guide

Grief Journal Prompts

Gentle prompts to help you process and express what you are carrying — in your own time, in your own words.

There is no right way to use these prompts. You do not have to write in full sentences, spell correctly, or make sense. You do not have to share what you write with anyone. This is for you. Write as little or as much as you need.

About grief journalling

Writing about grief can help in ways that talking sometimes cannot. It gives you a private space to say things you might not say out loud — to be angry, confused, devastated, or even occasionally okay. It gives your grief somewhere to go.

You do not need a special journal or a particular time of day. A notebook, a notes app, a piece of paper — whatever is available. Even a few minutes of writing can make a difference.

You do not have to have anything figured out before you start writing. Start with the words “Today I feel…” and see what comes.

Some of these prompts may feel right for where you are today. Others may feel too much, or not relevant. Skip anything that does not feel right. Come back to prompts another day. There is no order and no curriculum — use whatever helps.

Early grief — the first days and weeks

These prompts are for the raw, early stage of loss — when everything feels too large to hold.

01Today I feel…
02The hardest moment today was…
03Something I keep thinking about is…
04I didn’t expect grief to feel like…
05One thing I wish I could say to them is…
06What I am finding most difficult right now is…
07Something small that helped me today was…
08Right now, what I need most is…

Remembering the person you lost

These prompts invite you to write about who they were — not just that they are gone, but who they were to you.

09One of my favourite memories of them is…
10Something they said that I will never forget is…
11The thing I miss most about them is…
12Something they taught me — without even meaning to — was…
13If I could spend one more ordinary day with them, we would…
14A part of them that lives on in me is…
15Something I want to remember about them that I am afraid I might forget is…
16The way they made me feel was…
17A letter I want to write to them, starting with “Dear [name]…”

Exploring your feelings

Grief contains multitudes. These prompts invite you to sit with feelings that can be hard to name or admit.

18Something I feel guilty about — even if I know I shouldn’t — is…
19I am angry about…
20Something I have not been able to say out loud is…
21A feeling I did not expect to have after this loss is…
22Something that has surprised me about my grief is…
23A moment today when I felt something other than grief was…
24The feeling I am most afraid of right now is…
25What I most want people to understand about what I am going through is…

Your body and yourself

Grief affects the whole self — not just the mind. These prompts invite attention to how you are being held, or not held, by your body and your life.

26In my body, grief feels like…
27Something small I did to take care of myself today was…
28A place where I feel most at peace right now is…
29Something I am struggling to do that I usually find easy is…
30If my grief were a landscape, it would look like…
31What I need from the people around me — even if I have not been able to ask — is…
32Something I am proud of myself for, even in the middle of this, is…

Looking forward — when the time feels right

These prompts are not about moving on. They are about finding what continues — in you, and around you. Use them only when they feel possible.

33Something that still brings me a small amount of comfort is…
34A way I want to keep their memory alive is…
35Something I have learned about myself through this loss is…
36A value or quality of theirs I want to carry forward in my own life is…
37If they could see how I am doing right now, I think they would say…
38One thing I am still looking forward to, even in the middle of grief, is…
39Something I want to do in their honour or memory is…
40A message I would want to give my future self — the one who has learned to carry this — is…

For children and young people

These prompts are written for younger people — or for adults writing alongside a child. They can also be drawn, not just written.

41My favourite thing about [name] was…
42Something I wish I could tell them is…
43Today my feelings are like the colour… because…
44A happy memory I have of us is…
45Something that makes me feel better when I am sad is…
46Draw a picture of a memory you want to keep.
47Write or draw something that reminds you of them.
48Something I want them to know is…

A note on journalling and difficult feelings: Sometimes writing about grief can bring up intense emotions. If you find yourself overwhelmed, please stop and reach out to someone you trust. You can also call or text 1737 at any time — free, 24/7. Writing is meant to help, not to harm. Be gentle with yourself.

If you are in immediate danger, call 111.
Free 24/7 counselling: call or text 1737.
Lifeline: 0800 543 354 — Samaritans: 0800 726 666

Return to Grief Support NZ resources